So my girls and I always share interesting articles that we find on the internet. I forget who put me on to the 30 Life Lessons for 20-Somethings With Too Many Feelings from Thought Catalog, but its such a good list. The 30 life lessons are good for any woman. Not just 20-somethings. Some of my faves…
This past weekend, I was out with my girls having a late dinner after we saw Fast and Furious 6 (LOVED IT) and I couldn’t decide between a Mediterranean lamb burger or cobb salad. Since we were eating so late, I thought a salad would be better. Then I remembered #3 on this list. Salads aren’t always the best option once you load on all the extra ingredients.
3. A cobb salad has more calories than a double cheeseburger. Don’t kid yourself.
I love to debate. I’m still learning when to shut up. I’m stubborn and I just like to keep going and going. I definitely want my future husband to be a man who can give me an eye or look from across the room and I know “Okay time to shut it down.”
5. Argue. Debate. Disagree. That is the only way you will become privy to the beauty that is an organic learning environment. Keep an open mind. Listen. Nod at the appropriate time. Stand up for yourself when necessary and shut the fuck up when you should. A coalition of different viewpoints is essential to true understanding. Be prideful enough to lend verve to your voice and humble enough to know when your voice is cracking.
Music is my therapy. I live through music. Its apart of everything I do.
6. Music will save you. It will also kill you. Certain songs will repair gaping holes in your heart while others will send you back two years ago; when you were in his arms, kissing his lips, and resting your head on his shoulders as he strangled his fingertips with your hair. Regardless, music is a constant reminder that it’s okay to feel. It is okay to remember, to reminisce, and to be sad. It’s okay to cry laugh smile lose control scream dance become far too sentimental forget. To. Just. Be. Hiding behind intoxicating melodies and beautiful breakdowns is the universe’s permission to feel. So close your eyes and turn up the volume.
As to #7, tequila has never been my friend. #thatisall
I’ve learned that you never know how strong you are, until your strength is tested. You can survive situations that are meant to break you down. People who you think you can count on will disappoint you. That’s life, but don’t let it pull you down. Never allow yourself to be the victim. Always be the survivor.
16. You are capable of handling situations you couldn’t have possibly imagined. Fathers will disown you. The love of your life will sleep with someone else. The person who made you will hit you. Your best friends will die. A man will ignore your fervent “no” and take what he wants. And still you will find yourself filling your lungs when situations should have left them empty. It is in those moments that you’ll remember there isn’t anything you cannot overcome.
Keep on living. Keep on loving and be strong.
19. The ones you love the most will hurt you the most. Mothers will be incapable of protecting you when they should. The most important man in your life will hurl hurtful words in your direction. Best friends will write words dipped in resentment. You will reach out to someone in tears, scared and alone, only to have them decide it is too much and disappear. Forgive them instantly. Love them regardless. And know that you, despite your best efforts, have hurt them too.
There’s nothing like a good drive. Word to #18.
I have trouble asking for help. I hate doing it. So just know if I ever ask you for assistance, I really need it.
23. It is okay to ask for help. It is okay to swallow your pride, choke down your guilt, chew on your inadequacies, and realize that you cannot do everything by yourself. Everyone needs help at one time or another. Including you.
#29 reminds me of The Dream’s song “Fancy.” “If Christian Lacroix brings a smile, I’ll buy it…”
29. Whoever said money doesn’t buy happiness, lied. Sometimes, it takes money to find yourself at a concert with friends or three sheets to the wind or atop a needle sharing scenery with those that have never experienced it before. Pay for it anyways. Sign the check that makes your stomach turn. Eventually you will look back on those moments and realize that you would have paid twice that amount.
When I was 16 I planned out my wedding. From the dress to the honeymoon outfits. Around 20, I think I realized you can’t plan EVERYTHING in life. Sometimes the best laid plans don’t always work out. Sometimes its better to just let things happen. Let the chips fall where they fall.
30. You can plan and scheme and write in a neat little notebook. You can create numerous lists that await the swift line of completion, but it won’t matter. Nothing will end up the way you thought it would. Things will happen that you couldn’t have possibly foreseen. Life doesn’t care about the plan. The scheme. Your neat notebook. Or your fifty lists.
You can check out the complete list here.